Reader's Response
Aug 21: ‘A beautiful book. It made me laugh, and even cry a little too. It connected with me on so many levels. I grew up in an environment where alcohol ruled, but in my case it was my mother…I too have been through years of therapy… Your voice is a fond memory from my childhood, and when I heard you again after getting connected through the internet it made me smile, and for some strange reason feel safe. Thank you for your bravery in writing such an open and frank book: it takes a lot of guts to acknowledge one’s pain so openly’
Jacqueline, Geneva.
Aug 19: ‘I feel enriched, enlightened and full of hope. Beautiful read - write more please!’
Kaye.
July 26: ‘I only got to read your book last week. It moved me so much I had to read it a second time. It was somewhat like reading a story of myself… Having survived three tumours and just out of hospital after my heart attack, your book has given me hope. I enjoyed it, and it uplifted me from pity park. As a gay single man, lonely and searching — asking why me but no answers — your publication is a hidden strength to all male readers… I was touched that you mention Vincent Hanley and indeed his passing in your book. I am in the same boat as well; however, doing very well… I may never get the chance to shake your hand, or indeed meet you… In the meantime, I wish both you and Terry well…’
Weldon.
July 26: ‘I read your book and was shocked, very shocked. To be honest, I had some idea that you must have been through something tough because of how well you do what you do. Anyway, I hope things are going well for you now.’
Adrian, Belgium.
July 26: ‘I have just returned from Castlebar. While there I thought I would like to buy your book, but looking through it I was horrified to read your inaccurate account… We are so hurt that you should mock a man who was so good to your family… Who is or was George Bingham, that lived in a caravan up the arch way? The only Bingham who lived in C’bar was Lord Lucan's land agent. The person you were thinking about was…a great friend of your family… [These people} are all gone to their reward and cannot speak for themselves. [X] was a very charitable and kind man, something I cannot say about you. You have hurt so much with your inaccurate account of so many things…The next time you write a book, get your facts right, especially when you name people who cannot defend themselves… Needless to say I didn’t buy your book’
Mary, Armagh.
July 19: ‘Thank you for the book. What struck me as I began to read was how much we have in common… As I got more into the book, I realized I was reading about many events and feelings outside my experience…I had no experience of abuse, physical or sexual. I was much taken by the warmth with which you wrote of your life shared with your partner Terry… You are searingly honest about your dealings with those with whom you have had differences, personally and in work. (I take it your text passed the lawyers!)…Above all I do not have experience of cancer… Reading your account of your prostatectomy and its aftermath, and watching your subsequent interview on the Late Late show today online, what I experienced cannot compare in any way to the physical and psychological pain you have been through. If only one man makes that overdue appointment with his doctor after reading your book or hearing any of your interviews since its publication, it will have been worthwhile. If any of your other careers had failed, I think you could have been a writer on music; your insights on Bach’s music are deep… it is our privilege as performers to experience this music from the inside… Thank you, and congratulations on bringing your experience, in all its rawness, to such vivid life between these covers ’
Eoin, Languedoc, France.
July 4: ‘Congratulations on your excellent book… I admire your courage in every respect, not just in your battle with cancer, but in your bravery and fortitude in recounting the stories from your childhood in Castlebar. People come to you to open up their emotional wounds, but it takes a lot for you to expose yourself in public in such a way. Well done! ’
Tony.
July 4: ‘Your words are so poetic and full of meaning. I was moved and touched by your honesty and courage’
Tim.
June 4: ‘I took your book from the local library on June 3. I read the first page and was totally captivated. The poetry of the writing was splendid. I myself lost my husband to prostate cancer in July 2007…Like you he was surrounded by love…By coincidence, I had finished reading your book last night and woke this morning to hear your soft voice on the radio. To me your book was insightful into living as opposed to dying…Your story which you tell honestly is inspiring to me…’
Carmel, Dublin.
June 2: ‘I am in the process of reading your book. I find it very interesting and honest, and of course moving too… I am proud of you’
Finola.
May 30: ‘Just finished your book and really enjoyed it. Parts of it are very emotional…’
Jean.
May 28: ‘My friend lent me your book and it really moved me. I wrote this poem inspired by the book…
It's a colourful mosaic, brash, bright and bold. Each piece stands out, arresting to the eye. Separate individual pieces, yet seamlessly joining, effortlessly they flow on, a watershed, an outpouring. The scene slowly unfolds telling of bloody battles fought: your battle with cancer, and even more your battle with yourself. The latter is a battle we all must fight. Encouraged by the more experienced matadors, they who cannot fight this battle for us, however having been there before, gently understanding they offer hope. Somehow we find the courage to delve deep within, facing the often hidden multilayered truths. Wincing but undeterred by sweat and tears, we dare to look it squarely in the eye. We examine it all and then bravely proclaim out loud: some of me is darkness, cold, grey and messy; some of me is light, warm, shining bright. I cannot separate the halves, they’re too tightly entwined. It’s all me, but that’s alright. It is all right. It may seem a strange way to fight, fighting by accepting: embracing ourselves we win. Mindful we can go forward with courage, on to the next arena, at five in the afternoon.
It took courage to publish that book and make it public. I wish you inner peace, whatever your current arena’
Rosalind.
May 26: ‘…Your writing is so lyrical — not just about the cancer, but about the being of soul and self…Are you going to write another book? If so, sign me up. I only ever reread a small handful of books, and yours is one I will revisit…Stay strong, and thank you for sharing your thoughts and self’
Kathryn, Perth, Australia.
May. 16: ‘I purchased your book on Friday afternoon last, and finished it
this morning. My reading taste might be regarded as one dimensional as I
only read biographies for the most part, and frequently end up disliking the
subjects intensely. However, your book is one of the few which really moved
me, not only in terms of your story, but also your writing skill. Many of
your experiences have parallels in my own life… I want to thank you for your
reassuring service as a broadcaster, your honesty, and for telling a
gripping story with such style and grace’
Seán.
Apr. 10: ‘Just after reading your book. It was superb, such bravery and frankness in just stating it as it is. I loved your little Irish words and references to sayings I had not heard for ages. May you continue to enjoy life with the great friends you have. You are indeed blessed, as they are to have you as their friend. I really enjoy your writing’
Bridie, United Kingdom.
Apr. 10: ‘Last week in Invercargill (South Island, New Zealand) Public Library, whose face did I see smiling from the new purchases bookshelf? Michael Murphy - At Five in the Afternoon. It brought back many thoughts and memories of growing up in Ireland and the special news readings that would fill the background of our living room as I made my way through secondary school. Having read your book and the different perspective it gave me on things relating to Irish society, history, church, human psyche and cancer, it was nice to realize that the community here could also share in your experience. There is a high rate of cancer amongst the general population in this pocket of the world, and your journey and experiences will offer these cancer patients both a different perspective from which to deal with their situation, and best of all, hope. Thank you, Michael’
I. Lindsay, New Zealand.
Mar. 22: ‘I'm coming to the end of your book and loved it so much I just had to write and congratulate you on such a wonderful piece of literature. Not only is it beautifully written, but you show such knowledge of languages, poetry, religion, music, psychology etc., that it is an inspiration. It must be one of the outstanding books of modern times…’
Maureen, Tralee.
Mar. 17: ‘It's simply wonderful! Such a powerful, moving story, with the most magnificently-wrought prose. It's like reading a sculpture. What a great testament…’
Liz, Limerick.
Mar. 14: ‘I admire Michael’s courage and bravery in making his personal life so public…There is something god-like about the mortals in his story…’
Anne, Dublin.
Mar. 9: ‘Wie schön luchtet der Murphystern! Ein wahres Kunstwerk, durch wiefiel grauen Stunden. So traurig; aber so fromm und frohlich. So lebendig. So unputdownlich! Gott sei dank für unsere holde Kunst…die Musik. I can’t get any work done with my immersion in the book…’
Redmond, Dublin.
Mar. 2: ‘I have finished reading your book. It was absolutely brilliant. I found it both very inspiring and very sad. Just to say thank you for your honesty and warmth…’
Kathleen.
Mar. 1: ‘I loved your book so much I read it twice (and a bit more than twice) so I could ponder on it. I am so impressed with your beautiful writing. Your book is heart-warming and inspiring. I have no doubt you ruffled some feathers with your honesty, but what the heck…The treatment and road back have been rough, but you have survived. Thank God for Terry and your great women friends who walked the road with you… I lost my husband to prostate cancer, but his went undiagnosed for a considerable length of time, so his chances of survival were always slim…’
Mary, Dublin.
Feb. 16: ‘I have just finished your book and I want to congratulate you on a magnificent piece of art’
Bride.
Feb. 8: ‘I have just finished reading your wonderful book. I really enjoyed every page of it. Part of the book reminded me of myself: I had to endure the terrible trauma of wearing pad… Was glad to read you got over it, and have such a wonderful partner and friend in Terry… I got a lot of inspiration from little parts of your book, which has helped me a lot. God bless you and Terry’
Margaret, Dublin.
Jan. 25: ‘Thank you for sharing your wonderful story. I wish there were 100 more chapters. I really miss reading it. Think I'll start again!’
Josephine, Carlow.
Jan. 8: ‘I have just finished reading your book. I enjoyed your writing and your heroic attempt to cope with your cancer. That's until I got to your final chapter. Your disgusting and horrifying reference to an innocent animal ‘bellowing with pain and fright’ truly sickened me to the pits of my stomach… It is not a fair fight, Mr. Murphy. Any sympathy I had for you is truly forgotten… P.S. I await your response with interest’
Michael, Athlone.
Jan.1: ‘I sat down at 11.00 in the morning, and read your book through at one sitting… This man Kreitmeir, the expert, exists in all our lives. An irrelevancy made only relevant by the relevance we bestow on him… Yes, that’s you, aspiring to the Dominican colours of black and white, the phrase for aspirational clarity. I too must honour you with the truth. People have read your book and said it is too stark, too true, too much. And now that I’ve read it, I have learned more about them than you, and question now what they say about all other matters. There is no conditional in my statement… You were already a man my son. The impostors have never been in you, but appeared as they do outside in this world in all their forbidding forms. I do not know it all, but I do know my own wish to say this’ The news always ends with the weather. A foretelling of the elements. You have made a boat of Spain and Bach with oars of friendship, whose strength you may not realise. Should the boat capsize, there are too many forces to allow you to go down, the greatest of which are you and Terry, and the least of which are your friends, who make up a formidable air-tight indefatigably floating barrel, majestic to hang on to, and of course, like a bull, raging for your success. There will be a lot more news again…’
Declan, Dublin
Dec.28: ‘Thank you for your book. Thank you for writing so wonderfully… Thank you for sharing your inner thoughts and observations on life, family life, Irish life. It has comforted me in that never—ending anguish, searching to make some sort of sense of the world we live in, and the personal battles we each as individuals have to face… Motherhood is not acknowledged as a job, or credit given to the responsibilities it entails. My job is to try and make sure my sons do not carry on the sins of their forefathers — the cancer of alcoholism, the cancer of depression, and the cancer of self-hate… Your book has given me an insight, a little, into the male psyche. For that I will always be grateful, and I hope I can use bits of it to support my boys as they grow into young men’
Ingrid.
Dec.24: ‘Having recently finished your book having purchased it in Westport, I would like to compliment you on a job well done: great reading’
Ger.
Dec.17: ‘I have read your wonderful, touching book, tinged with so much sadness, humour and love. I feel like wrapping my arms around you: I do hope you feel the warmth of someone you have never met…I have your book on my hospital locker, and I talk to the staff about the wonderful read’
Rita, West Cork.
Dec.9: ‘I did of course buy and read your book — it was powerful, moving and beautifully written. Having followed your painful journey, I now rejoice every time I hear you reading the news — no matter how awful the story may be!’
Ann, Dublin.
Dec.16: ‘I got to part 22 in your book and went back to the start… I didn't want the journey it took me on to stop. I have a problem with how I see the world, and words are sometimes hard for me to make out. This was the case with your book, and yet I don't need to make out every word because I could feel the emotions coming through my hands, up my arms, and into my heart. This, by far, has been for me a great read. I cried along with you as the band marched by. I felt huge anger at the people who treated you as a non-person. I felt despair and hope mixed into one. I felt love. I want to thank you for letting me see the man behind the face… I hope as my pen crosses this page I do not somehow step over the line in what I am about to say. You said in your book that not being a father bothered you. With all the people that have come to your rooms, children dressed in the skin of the adult and you helping them to fill that skin � is this not a father's task? Fathers like yourself and your partner Terry give a safe place to each and every child that visits your house… When they were finished the rearing you gave them, have you not somehow stopped what may have been going on for generation after generation? I know you are a good father� Again, thank you for the book.’
John, Swords.
Dec 13: ‘I want you to know of my appreciation for your book and of your writing. I'm not finished it yet, about 70% through, but don't expect that its appeal is going to wane at this stage… I have enjoyed it, a few pages every couple of nights, and I feel a tremendous calm while reading it. It's as if your voice jumps from the page and I feel that is where the calm comes from, for me… The main thing I wanted to acknowledge was the sheer beauty of your writing. Your prose flows so beautifully that it gives me the same feeling I get from reading a Leonard Cohen poem, or hearing a Nick Drake song. That beauty of a dawn which we all want to recapture, unencumbered by bitterness or darkness, and it is that light which shines through. I think the photo on the back captures it perfectly for me. Thank you for sharing it, and writing it…’
David, Cork
Nov 27: ‘I have just finished reading your book and from the moment I started reading it I couldn’t put it down. Every word had meaning, honesty, integrity and goodness’
Maureen.
Nov 20: ‘…I would like to thank you for a most enjoyable read…I am sure your graphic description of your illness will be a source of comfort for those suffering from serious illnesses in terms of facing the problem and dealing with it in a positive way. I am sure their friends and colleagues will also draw great strength from it… However, the part of the book that gave me the most pleasure was your writing of your wonderful brother and my wonderful friend Kie. On reading it I first experienced enormous sadness… this was soon replaced by many great memories of the great times I had spent with this amazing person. I will always treasure your writing about him…’
Paul, Dublin.
Nov 17: ‘Thank you for sharing your story and your wisdom. It is a very courageous thing to commit to paper the privacies of thought and action that make up one’s life (verbum scriptum manet!) and in your own case, made all the more so by being so publicly recognisable. I absolutely congratulate you and salute your courage… Your book has been an immense help. It has really challenged me to be more honest and less flippant about cancer and its effects particularly when being with men who are suffering cancer… Your book has invited me to treasure health as a gift of God; not glibly but really… You have given us so much to be hopeful about in the midst of the horrible messiness cancer brings, and you remind us of the victory of hope over despair every time your beautiful voice emanates from the radio. Reading your life story I was struck again and again how much in touch with God you are… I suspect much of God has been revealed to you through Terry and your relationship with him. From your writings it appears Terry has incarnated much of the love and tenderness of God; what a blessing!’
Alan, Galway.
Nov.15: ‘Your honesty is uplifting and your story while most personal in nature becomes universal with your fine telling… I too found myself in that cold and dark place wondering if I might see another year… I came through it (for now — they call it ‘watchful waiting’ I’m told) but it was not without its scars… Like yourself, I am blessed with the company of remarkable women… Your book could and should act as almost a reference book and source of searing honesty and hope. Your philosophical and spiritual approach to this distressing and discomforting disease is a testament to your remarkable spirit. I …grew up with your voice… The chapter on The Broadcast voice should be required reading for all… who speak in front of a microphone’
Martin, Kilkenny.
Nov.11: ‘I just finished your book which I found honest and candid’
Henry, Boston.
Nov.4: ‘…to read your memoir was a joy and a wonder’
Timothy, England.
Nov.4: ‘Have just finished reading At Five in the Afternoon, and enjoyed it very much. Your memories of Newbridge — good and not too good like everyone else — brought me back. And as I am recovering from having my prostate removed last June, I certainly can identify with what you went through, but thankfully I never had a moment�s pain, except when my doctor was removing the 30 clips. Well done on being so forthright, while being very reflective on the downs and ups of life’
Dermot.
Nov.3: ‘I nearly finished your wonderful book. I will miss you so much — I have enjoyed your company. I intend to read it again to fully absorb the book. Thank you for allowing me to join you on your journey’
Eithne.
Nov.1: ‘Your honesty of story and experience of life is truly both brave and inspirational, but more importantly, so vital as an identification for the many of us who have had similar life experiences. Well done, sir…’
Brian, Dublin.
Oct.29: ‘One of the extraordinary things about your book, for me, is the way in which it succeeds in exploring and transfiguring experiences, which so often remain unilluminated and unexpressed. The honest and courageous recounting of your experience of cancer — at so many levels — is so powerful in itself. But in your weaving of connections between the experience of cancer and of other life experiences, brilliantly and movingly demonstrating how each traumatic experience evokes and relates to others, you have illustrated, in literary form, how we experience life and its traumatic moments: not as a series of bounded events, but as a web or tapestry where past and present are fite fuaite, and form themes that accompany or underlie our lives… One of the many things that I have been struck by in your writing is the marriage of what you have written, and the way in which you have written it. The subject matter and the form through which you express it dance together, illuminate and fit each other in a way that is extraordinary, and unlike anything that I have read before. Your references to music, language and voice throughout the book strike me as reflecting both the form of the book, as well as the experiences it describes. As a newsreader, your distinctive voice has been part of my life…I hear the same voice in your writing, the same lucidity, warmth and compassion, as you use words like musical notes to compose a score that tells the truth as a totality that includes both past and present, internal and external experience… At Five in the Afternoon is so many things, Michael; not least it is a beautiful work of art, as Bach, flamenco and the bullfight are works of art. Like these art forms, your writing does not aestheticise experience through suppressing or avoiding it, rather it engages experience in all its joy and its pain. And in expressing the truth of experience, in dancing with it, it transfigures it�Reading your words, I feel hopeful. Seeing what you have succeeded in achieving with words, leads me to think that there is a possibility that I may sometime manage to �yoke myself to the words� and inhabit them, as you have done so beautifully and powerfully here… I am so touched by your experiences, so moved by your courage and honesty in expressing them and by your compassion for those who caused you to suffer, so very happy that you have finally found an opportunity to tell the truth and to be heard, and amazed by your capacity to offer your experiences as a gift to those who hear them, not just to those touched by cancer, but also to those who have been silenced by difficulty and suffering, and by the fear of telling it like it is, even to themselves — or especially to themselves. As an expression of your soul, it is a beautiful thing that sings…I believe the music of your writing will bring all of us into the circle of belonging, and open that possibility to the many, as I hope it has to you. Congratulations and thanks for your book, Michael; I wish you good health, happiness, love and belonging now and always’
Jeanine, Galway.
Oct.29: ‘…your book pained me so much. I have rarely if ever been so disturbed by any book; perhaps it was that I expected so much more from you. This book has so little to do with male cancer�but more to do with you casting some of your demons to the masses seeking some sort of personal solace. I had hoped to find a mind that had matured and developed…I have never read a book that has so little empathy for others, in particular the reader. Why did you inflict on us the readers, sordid little details of your puerile life, and incidents that add little to understanding your character, or add to the book in anyway? We have a saying here that could be apt: you have shamed yourself, your family, your friends and colleagues in the manner you portrayed them…In fairness, the only character who comes out well is your partner Terry, who has had a real — not imagined — situation to take from his early life. Indeed your story may have been far better told if he was the narrator, for I feel he would have introduced compassion — a sentiment that never touches your narrative…I am sorry to say that the world would have been a better place if this book was never written. I am so, so disappointed’
Eddie, Kinsale.
Oct.28: ‘I have just finished your wonderful book which I read slowly and carefully so I could absorb every one of your fascinating thoughts full of truth and honesty. I�m sure you are a great help to the many people who have to face the many difficult situations you have had to deal with in your very interesting and full life’
Liam, Westport.
Oct.20: ‘Wow and thank you for the amazing human life story called ‘At Five in the Afternoon’. I finished it last night and I was compelled to second read the final chapter this morning. I will forward the book‘s descriptive details to some avid readers I know immediately after this email. Although a fine thread of your cancer links all the pages and chapters together, the book is far more than the story of your battle with it… Thanks again’
Derek.
Oct.10: ‘Brilliant, moving, wonderful book…I wept at the story of Kie…My wife is parsing and analysing each paragraph, but being from Mayo myself, I allowed the Atlantic currents of words to carry me along. Your honesty about your parents is hard hitting and was not easy for you to write I’d assume…Your words and example are inspiring’
Seán, Kerry.
Oct.07: ‘I finished reading your book last night — it is magnificent. As I read it, I felt I was hearing your story from yourself in your wonderful voice. When I hit the last paragraph that feeling was endorsed: you finished all the stories from a Béaloideas finish… ‘sin é mo scéal, má tá bréag ann, ní mise a chum é ’ May you have many more happy trips to your beloved Mijas — I‘ve been there so I enjoyed your account of the area’
Marie, Cork.
Oct.6: ‘The book is about healing the soul— Enhorabueno, Michael, for this great achievement’
Debora, Spain.
Oct.05: ‘Comhgháirdeachas ó chroí! I cried. I got very angry. I laughed out loud. What a wonderful story beautifully told with nothing held back. I can‘t tell you how much I enjoyed reading it. I can only imagine how difficult it was to write — laying yourself bare is never easy. However I‘ve been spreading the word that it‘s a ‘must read’ so hopefully people will get out and buy it.’
Máire, Galway.
Oct.04: ‘I‘ve just finished reading your book. I found it to be a very open and honest account of your life and experiences. Your insight into the nature of, and the uniquely Irish slant on the human condition, was clearly derived from a psyche which takes joy in observation and storage, retold with great humour. I believe your honesty will help a lot of people’
Sandra, Dublin.
Oct.04: ‘Reading the book, I felt a first person/third person flip flop of emotional identification with your story. The flowing narrative style of the narrative present to past, as we do in life, [captured me] so that I surrendered to its flow like a moving river of presence, to watch a heart being intimately uncovered in its secret place. For me, it had the quality of benediction. A real presence, a tender grace; sometimes frightening, always honest. In engaging with the narrative, there was a strong feeling that time was suspended, which was a bit of a surprise. I read until finished, and I�m surprised that the after wave still comes at moments of openness… When you hear a story told as yours was, it becomes an event, unique, exciting, powerful and cathartic… It showed a man could be purposefully open and not collapse into total identification with one‘s wounds, that we are more than our slights and hurts’
Colm, Dublin.
Sept.20: ‘Read your book cover to cover this weekend, Michael — I loved it, I cried, I laughed, and cried some more. Well done!’
Aisling, Dublin.
Sept.19: ‘The searing and heartbreaking honesty from you, and the writing out of your being in the world is astonishing. The flow of honesty along with your natural author style, creates for me a boundary to what is not possible to capture for some, and it‘s a dawn in casting a light on seeming shadow— It is an overcoming of a death dice throw, which leaves the dice spinning away. Salvific, I suppose, is a religious word I‘d use. The bleakness of the cancer knell is weakened by that boundary of your honesty, and the weaving of your story through the varied cultural backdrops’
Bernard, Dublin.
Sept.10: ‘Your book is wonderful and clever too… smart and quick with ideas’
Nora, Dublin.